Humor - Opinionated - Techy Bytes

I honestly find this story pretty funny and annoying at the same time. Because it bothers me a great deal that Mr. Dubois is trying to sue his teach for not telling & demon-straighting that electricity is actually dangerous, when you attempt to clamp yourself and flip the switch. Like that's something out of a horror movie. Why would anyone do that to them selfs or help, if they value life?? Like who Well apparently this "kid" or extremely dumb kid hasn't seen very many scary movies. Doesn't know what happens when you flip the switch. Like how can some be so oblivous to not know that Electricity is Dangerous. How? And now his family is suing his teacher for medical costs and loss of wages? I hope it's covers extra mental care too. And honestly lets hope Mr. Dubois is looking into being a electrician as a future career.

Kyle Dubois Forgets that electricity is actually dangerous

(pic of the original news story headline)

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Posted By: jkund17 - Category: Humor, Opinionated, Pictures, wowza, News, How it Goes

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Farts - How to Dispose of the Smell Quickly

June 14th 2007 13:18

A scientific experiment and analysis that shows what the best thing to do after farting is to avoid the smell, especially in an enclosed area with lots of other people. 'He did it!' would work best here.

Farts Studing - Watch more free videos

The video interested me so much so that I visited Wikipedia to find out about farts (or more accurately 'flatulence'). I discovered some interesting things about them.

For instance the typical 'flatus' contains hydrogen, were talking about raw hydrogen here, alternative fuels anyone? Whats that you say? We don't fart enough? Nope, wrong, we fart twenty to thirty times a night on average.

Obviously we shouldn't be escaping our farts, we should be embracing them. All we need to do is catch the farts... somehow.

Naturally the internet wouldn't dissapoint, I found this helpful infomercial:

Though it is kind of rusty, wouldn't want to sleep with that sticking out of me buttocks. A more modern alternative:

Seriously, we could solve our energy problems through the power of fart alone. If there are those of us who don't fart much other people who fart more could sell theres.

Hey it's crazy, but in ten to twenty years it might be a reality.

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated, Cutting|Edge

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Screwing With Nature

May 13th 2007 13:47

While we can make great headways in our society we can't fight our physical make up, we can't have sex like rabbits lest we get STD's, we can't prolong our own lives lest we live in misery and we certainly can't have babies at the tender age of 60 lest we be jerks.

Think about it, after thousands of years of developing we as humans have been fine tuned to make babies at a young age, somewhere between 16 and 30 is probably the ideal age, statistically speaking once you reach 40 the chances of you producing mutant offspring increases considerably.

Of course we being the greedy bastards that we are have found a way to have babies at the ripe old age of 60, too bad we haven't come up with something that guarantee us life up until 100 years of age otherwise the idea of letting a baby sag out of you at 60 just might have been a good idea.

So what will this woman provide for her kids? She'll be in a nursing home by the time her children are in high school, imagine getting teased to hell and back. On top of that when you're old you simply lack the stamina to raise kids, in truth when you're at that age you're looking for grand kids, not just kids.

Bleh, society is so screwed.

But whatever.

In other news this video had me cracking up:

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Health, Humor, Opinionated

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Ex-President Bill Clinton Promotes Sex In Africa

May 9th 2007 03:49

You think to yourself 'if this really is the lord of the conservative Christians then by god the lord is an asshole'.

If I were a certain someone this is how I would spin the news that Bill Clinton has struck up a deal with drug companies to lower the price of AIDS drugs and make it possible to buy a pill that should be taken daily for less than $1

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated

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Why the (conservative)Messenger Must Die (and how NOT to blog)

April 30th 2007 02:03

Blogging for most is about finding interesting news in and around the web, bringing it back to your blog, posting your opinion on it and linking to the article. Of course you can add a spin on it but there is a limit where you take a story out of context, warp it to your own views then claim innocence when someone actually reads the article. Thats what conservatives (bloggers?) do, and thats what this one did.

Linking to an article and claiming it is what (in a satirical manner) is tarnishing the image of Islam, apparently implying thats what the article he is linking to is trying to get across. Of course he claims he didn't write it hence claims all immunity, perhaps I'll link to an article about dandy lions being the reason for AIDS when it's only about dandy lions causing allergies then claim innocence that I'm just the messenger, of course thats another story entirely

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated, wowza, How it Goes

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Being a Geek Sucks

April 26th 2007 15:07

Let me just get one thing straight, theres a difference between being a geek and being a hobbyist, if you're interested in movies or even 'Dungeons and Dragons' you're cool, if you're unhealthily obsessed then you're a geek, you're unsocial, you're pathetic.

There is no positive for being a geek no matter how you spin it
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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated

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Why Conservatives Are Just Not Funny

April 4th 2007 13:52

The Half Hour News Hour (which even had the name stolen from an older TV show) has been on and around for a while, though not making much of a splash on youtube I do try to look over the fence every once in a while to remind myself that there are people with other opinions which I must respect (though they never seem to return the favor, like a 102 year old Widowed woman living next door to you with her many cats).

I don't understand how 'The Half Hour News Hour' could be funny, I know what funny is, even if I am on the butt end of the joke I know what funny is, funny is confidence, funny is keeping a straight face, funny is keeping your tone consistent (unless the joke involves a lack of consistent tone which is another story all together), most importantly, funny is when you treat your audience with respect and not treat them like a bunch of pre-schoolers watching Playschool, to do that you have to have a little bit of humiliation, ease up a little, something conservatives don't even understand

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated

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Why Islam is a Backwards Religion

February 24th 2007 07:04

Yes it is, so backwards, it doesn’t allow people to think freely, it forces narrow-mindedness and intolerance and it definitely doesn’t produce people like me who go to university and write on blogs.

Lets face it, it’s all a tremendously huge conspiracy theory by evil Muslims, never in history have Muslims and non-Muslims, lived together in peace under Islamic rule, never in history has the structure of an Islamic government changed (for better or for worse) oh and most certainly never in history has a Muslim not wanted anything more than peace. They are all just evil hell bent on suicide bombings

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Posted By: Ahmed - Category: Humor, Opinionated, wowza

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